Saturday, January 21, 2012

Just a Little Vent Session...

I love facebook.
I love reading blogs.
I love pinterest.

Having said that... While on facebook the other day I ran across a post that confused me.  So I had to do a little investigating, and upon my investigation, what I found really upset me.   A fellow party planner, Creative Juice, planned and put together a Potty Party to celebrate their child finally being potty trained.  Any parent that has successfully gotten their child out of diapers knows what a BIG deal that is and what a huge accomplishment that can be, not only for the kid, but for mom and dad who NO LONGER have to drop $$$$$ on diapers!!!  Whoo Hooo!!!  Now, would I throw my kid a Potty Party... probably not.  We celebrated that milestone by going to Monster Jam.  To each their own.  And her party was amazing.  So cute... All the way from the cute little fondant undies that topped the cupcakes to the toilet paper wreath.  But then, some blogger found her party utterly annoying and disliked it so much that she felt the need to rip her a new one by posting about it on her blog called People I Want to Punch in The Throat.  Why would people even visit a blog with that name?  That is so distasteful!  She went on and on and on about how much she hated the idea of this party and just everything about it, that then other blog readers jumped on her band wagon and went on and on and on about how stupid they thought it was as well.  And if that wasn't bad enough, then they went over to the Creative Juice blog to then comment again about how stupid of a party they thought it was... just flat out ugly, rude, and disrespectful comments.  I just don't get how people can be so inconsiderate of other people's feelings.  What ever happened to the "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" standard or what about "treat others the way you want to be treated"?  I think too often people forget that their words can be so hurtful and damaging to a person's feeling of self worth. 

I guess this all just hit too close to home for me because now that I've got this gig on tv, it just reminded me of how people have NO filters and don't think before they speak... or as now with facebook, blogs, and even pinterest, they can hide behind typing.  People feel they can hide behind their computer screens and just lay it all out there, not even thinking of the damage their rude comments can have on others... when in all actuality, they would NEVER say anything like that to that person's face.  I knew going into this co-hosting job that I would need to get some pretty thick skin, because as hard at it is to believe, not everyone is going to like me.  (I know, crazy, huh?!)  But the first time I saw a rude comment about me on facebook, it stung.  A lot.  And I wish I could say there's only been one hater, but that would be a lie.  People must not think that the person they're bashing and tearing down has feelings, I guess, because I can't think of any other reason why they would do that, like what they have to say and their opinion is more important than the person's feelings they're trashing.  What do they have to gain from it all?  Does it make them feel better?  I know I should just ignore it all, but that's so hard to do.  They say, don't even check facebook... ummmm... do you even know me??  Like that would ever happen.  I know there will always be haters.  I can't control that... but I can control how I respond and react.  And that is something that Mindy of Creative Juice has done gracefully.  She has had so much support from other party gals and even got her party featured on Hostess With the Mostess!  That's amazing! 

So why?  Why even go there?  If you don't like it (or someone in my case), keep it to yourself.  Instead of tearing each other down, how about we give a little praise?  Would that kill ya?  Or how about we just keep our sweet little pie holes shut...
If only the saying "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" were true...
It couldn't be any further from the truth...
Words hurt.  Words sting.  Words suck sometimes.  

So, how about for 2012, we think before we speak.
I'm so thankful that I haven't had any P-n-P haters and I'm thankful for each and every one of my blog followers and facebook fans. They're the best.

So, from now on...
Anyone who feels the need to bash me and say ugly things to me via ciLiving's facebook page or e-mail will get the following response from me... "Bless your heart.  Have a nice day!"

10 comments:

Jan Falvey said...

I agree, Heather. While I wouldn't throw a party, Keira got a special "Big girl" gift. But she is a mother and if she can afford to throw the party, then it is totally her choice, and it actually sounds cute. But more important than that is the fact that our society as a whole seems to have forgotten how a lot of us were raised... do unto others and be respectful. Really is it any surprise that there is so much bullying amoung children when adults behave so badly and it is continuously swept under the rug or overlooked? It's not okay. It's shameful and hurtful that as a society we condone this kind of behavior. Seriously, people stop for a minute and remember that little people learn by example!

Tiaras & Bow Ties - Think Smink said...

your post hit home for me, as the mother of a special needs child I can attest that both young and old seem to have issues with bullying and speaking before the think. I have been opening up about these issues over on my blog lately to try to spread the word. Even the Bible declares the tongue a sword, some have no clue or no care to realize that words hurt to the bone and can shatter self esteem! I am so incredibly happy you chose to even bring this incident to light and not just sweep it under the rug. There are things that can be done about people like that, they can be reported and removed from FB, pretty sure they can be reported to their bloghost as well. What a shame this group of bloggers is even around to run such a shameless and disgusting blog.

Elizabeth Ann (Elizabeth Ann's Recipe Box said...

PREACH on it! :-) Can't imagine anyone being mean to you! :-) You are too nice! :-)

mindy starr cone said...

thank you so much for your kind words! they warm my heart! i have a pretty good sense of humor about all of this, but some things that were said in comments on my blog as well as the other were just plain mean. I can't tell you how much it has meant so me that so many have voiced thier opinion on this situation and come to our defense!
you are a sweetheart and i thank you so much for this post :)
- mindy from Creative Juice

mom22 said...

Amen!

Michelle G said...

and REALLY how sad when people think their view is SO much more valuable than others! :( While I have never had a Potty Party with any of mine - I can PROMISE you I felt like celebrating each and every time we said goodbye to those diapers!!
This mama invested time, $$ and a LOT of thought into that party that simply said "I'm proud of my little one" - oh that every parent so openly praised their kids for each life achievement!

sewinggirl said...

I'm with you Heather. I am new at this social network game, but I imagine there will be someone out there who won't like me either. You go girl and I hope they all have a NICE DAY! We will stand together !!

Bridgitte said...

I'm actually in the process of beginning my 11 month old granddaughter (whom I keep daily) to potty training. I was given heck by some "family members of the other side" saying I was pressuring her...yadda yadda.
The truth is, since I am with her 8-10 hours a day 5 days a week I have seen the "signs" of her beginning to recognize the need to go. Regardless of the other in laws constant interfering we are triumphing daily. Reading your vent gave me a great idea to do just what this mother did....have a celebration party! When the time comes and she's completely trained of course. I think ANY reason to celebrate a child's accomplishment of any kind, no matter how big or small is a reason to praise and shower them with positive words!
This blogger in my opinion should have just kept her thoughts to herself. Poo on her. (not literally...lol)
I recently posted a letter to whom I call my blog-stalker. I assume it is a female and I received a horrible, horrible letter about my personal stories and pictures I had posted. Almost eerie. After much thought and prayer I simply wrote to this person, who obviously felt the need to check my blog on a regular basis although she hated its contents. If you hate it then MOVE ON! no one is keeping you there reading. Shoot, I see lots of things I don't agree with personally, not to mention my spiritual beliefs, but who am I to call them out? I wont, or shall I say I wont by being nasty.
anyway....in a nutshell....KUDDOS to her for her celebration and to her child's accomplishment. To the person who wrote the remarks they must be very closed minded and negative.
Thanks for your view.
P.S. I only have 3 "followers" and one of them is my old blog...haha! so when I got the letter from this person it irritated me more that they are following me privately and not big enough to show their face! just saying'

Tara said...

I know I am going to get ripped a new one for this, but....While I understand the golden rule, etc. I have read People I Want to Punch in the Throat and she gives a fair warning to readers about the nature of her blog. She also says not to take her too seriously. How do we separate freedom of speech like that? It's not freedom of positive speech. Now I wouldn't go so far as to leave the negative comments on the person/subject's blog. THAT is not acceptable, that is where the golden rule applies, but you are bashing her blog idea just as she was bashing the party idea. Don't blame a blogger for her ignorant readers who can't play nice and go leave mean comments. I'm sorry that happened to you Mindy, I know my feelings would be hurt as well.

Jenn said...

Well first of all, I couldn't agree with you more... how could ANYONE (with half a brain) not like you?? Seriously? You are like the world's NICEST, sweetest person? It is their loss for not seeing that.

Second, I couldn't agree with you more. The golden rule is still the most amazing rule there is. And why people hide behind their computer, instead of learning to effectively - and PRODUCTIVELY - communicate, is beyond me. The only thing that still gives me hope, is that there are still some of us out there, who will continue to teach right and wrong, social courtesy, and kindness to our children.

Keep your chin up, my sweet friend. You are loved very much!!